1.17 Time makes me its toy

Little Britney was born around 4 a.m. Since she had been extremely small and light, Anna and Jo couldn’t take her home right away, but had to leave her with the doctors and nurses for a couple of months. Although they were allowed to visit every day, there were still too many hours of insecurity, spent at home. Minutes felt like hours, hours felt like days. Since Birdy was taken care of by a babysitter, Anna and Jo had many chances to talk. The first days, the conversations would revolve around banalities like the weather or the new mailman. But as time passed, their topics became more serious. Anna was disappointed of Jo, because he barely seemed to care for her anymore. Jo was disappointed of Anna, because she completely dedicated herself to Birdy and the garden, not letting him in. Each night, when they lay next to each other in their bed without their youngest daughter sleeping in her crib, something new came to the surface. The jobs, the horses, household chores, socializing, Birdy, the garden – all of this was part of both of their lives, they just had trouble adjusting. Especially with Birdy’s birth, everything had been reset. They had to find their new places within this family, which was hard, but now that they knew they were not alone, they swore everything would be different. And the day Britney finally came home, Anna and Jo seemed like a couple nobody could ever tear apart.

But more changes had been necessary. They had agreed that two horses and two kids was too much to handle, so they once again called the animal shelter, who sent someone to pick Freebird up. She was supposed to spend her last months with people who had enough time for her. Letting her go almost broke Jo’s heart, because he’d had her since he moved in with Chuck. But he couldn’t risk ruining his family, which was the only thing that really counted in the end. And if it meant releasing Freebird, this was the right thing to do.

Finally, there were more friendly and romantic interactions between Anna and Jo again. Britney was a sweet little girl who actually slept through most of the nights, giving her parents a chance to rest. Birdy sometimes was more trouble, but far from being too hard to handle.

Jo and Anna took turns taking care of the kids. They loved both equally, so there were no favorite children. One day Jo would feed and bathe Britney, while Anna tried to teach Birdy how to talk. The next day Jo found himself cleaning the toddler’s potty, while Anna cuddled with Britney. They had become a real family, and even they later thought back to those previous days with tears in their eyes, remembering how poorly Britney had been in the beginning, it had strengthened their family bonds. 

Not even Kokette was left out. The children were too small to play with her, but Jo and Anna sometimes took her out for a ride. Mostly Jo, because his riding skills were way better than his wife’s. He enjoyed being on a horseback, and he often thought of Freebird while doing so. On her he had learned how to ride, and what not to do to avoid being thrown off the horse. It had been a lovely time, and Freebird had really helped him get over the mess that was his life at that point. Now she was gone, which maybe was a sign that he was done with what had been before. 

The little garden was growing every day, producing masses of weed that regularly needed to be pulled out. Anna learned that certain kinds of weeds came with certain kinds of plants, which was fascinating, even though it didn’t erase the fact that there was a lot of work to be done. The bugs and snails didn’t lighten her mood, either.

 

They even seemed to make her sick. This was the only possible explanation for her frequent visits to the bathroom that she was suffering from ever since Britney had come home. Whenever Anna sat in front of her freshly harvested salad, thinking of the animals that had been in it before, she knew that she was going to throw up. At some point, she even started feeling sick without being near any food. Was this some sort of new snail-phobia? 

 

While his wife was suffering at home, Jo stayed out long after work sometimes, blowing off some steam with his coworkers. One girl, who was helping out twice a week, was particularly nice to him, and they often talked for hours after their shift had ended. By this time, Jo was almost famous in town, and he knew this made him more popular for women.

 

Talking to this girl, who, in fact, was still a teenager, showed him how old he already was, and it filled him with grief. She had her whole life in front of her, maybe as a musician as well, while he was happy about every new day he had with his family.

 

At home, a huge surprise was waiting for him. Anna was expecting again. He was stunned, and sad at the same moment. If this baby – he hoped it would be a boy – was to be born in a little less than a year, there was a great chance it would grow up without a father.

Before he could worry about this for long, it was time for Britney’s second birthday. Again, Anna took the lead and blew out the candles with her, while Jo was watching from a distance. It had been quite some time since Birdy had had her second birthday, but it felt like only yesterday.

 

To be precise, it had been four years since that special day. A few weeks later, she celebrated her sixth birthday, which meant she was ready to go to school. Their little girls were growing up so fast, and soon they were to be joined by a third sibling. 

Time was passing way too fast.


Author's notes: Namesake for Britney, as you may have guessed, is Britney Spears. Don't laugh, she had some good songs before she shaved her head and stuff. 
I'm very slowly catching up with the story, even though I'm still a number of chapters away. Maybe we'll get there by Halloween :-P