Monday, September 30, 2013

1.20 Reset


Jo’s sudden and unexpected death was hard for everybody. Although Billy hadn’t really gotten to know his father, he had seen enough of him to understand what had made him so special. Britney and Beth were too small to grasp the concept of death, while Birdy was broken inside. Her wish to become a doctor someday only grew stronger.


But certainly, it was Anna who suffered the most. Many years she had lived with a husband who had loved her more than anything in the world, and she now was alone again. The man who could protect her from all the bad was no longer around. She was left with four children, no money, a job she didn’t really like any longer, a unicorn, and a garden that needed a lot of attention. As did the other factors in her life. How was she supposed to deal with all of this? Every night, when she went into the empty bedroom, and climbed into the bed that was cold and uncomfortable without Jo’s warmth, she prayed. It was a new experience for her, and she felt unsure during the first nights, but she had nothing to lose now. She prayed for her children and herself, she prayed that she had the strength to get through this.


Dressing in colors seemed inappropriate for her. She didn’t tell her children to wear black, they could deal with their grief in their own ways, but she felt like black was the only color that expressed how her soul looked like.


It didn’t made her feel much better, though. She spent a lot of time in the garden, while Birdy and Billy were in school – the school year was drawing to a close – and Britney and Beth were with a nanny, helping the plants come to life, which was her way of process her husband’s death. Often the children came home to find no lunch prepared, because Anna had spent the entire day outside again. Birdy understood how her mother felt, and tried to compensate the lack of parental affection for her younger siblings. She was not even a teenager yet, but for some time she took over the role of a mother in the house. Because her own mother couldn’t.


The only one Anna turned to on a regular basis was Kokette. The unicorn had been there when it had happened, and being around her comforted Anna. It gave her the feeling of having been there herself.


Billy was less than thrilled with the current situation. He was sad about his father’s loss, but since he hadn’t really known him very long, he wanted the family life to get back to normal as soon as possible. Not having warm lunch at home sucked. Having to do his tricky homework alone sucked. Seeing Birdy and Anna crying all the time sucked. He loved his mother and his siblings, but he wanted them to get over it. As long as that didn’t happen, he dreamt of his future. Being surrounded by butlers and maids twenty-four hours a day, having meals served whenever he wanted to, wearing expensive clothes and doing whatever he wanted to do. Oh, yeah. He was going to be a real celebrity, and nobody could stop him.